Disabilities-R-Us

Created by and for people with physical disabilities.

Funny Questions and Comments.

Sep 24, 1997

This is an archival transcript of one of our past meetings. We don't have scheduled topical meetings anymore, but we're not opposed to the idea of bringing them back if someone is willing to commit to hosting them on a "long term" basis.

Participants already present:
  Disabled ([email protected])
  HandiBot ([email protected])
  ChanServ ([email protected])
  Mooooooo ([email protected])
  DopeHat ([email protected])
  HelloKit ([email protected])
  Riverboat ([email protected])
  Countrybo
  CincyKid ([email protected])
  Mimi ([email protected])
  Mooooooo via Telnet ([email protected])
  Mooooooo via Telnet ([email protected])
Countrybo: does it hurt when you walk like that?
DopeHat: whats wrong
Mimi: my back, Keith :o(
Riverboat: 9:00 pm here now
*** CincyKid is now known as Catz
HelloKit: Guess what everyone! My first meeting in almost a month!!!
Mimi: hello Catz :o)
DopeHat: you need to pop that thing out mimi
Mimi: welcome back Carly :o)
Mooooooo: Catz :o)
Mimi: LOL Keith
HelloKit: So are we all ready to start?
Catz: hello everyone
Countrybo: GO
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Mimi: 6 weeks, Keith
Mooooooo: yep
Mimi: hello Jeff :o)
HelloKit: You guys want me to use caps today or no?
Mooooooo: color
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HelloKit: Color, okie-dokie.
DopeHat: color
Riverboat: color
DopeHat: red
Pyro: it's a pitty my ircii client can't convert colors :(
HelloKit: Do you often get looks and stares from other people?
Countrybo: hell yes
DopeHat: yes
Riverboat: all the time
Catz: yes
Countrybo: i dont even notice anymore is that ok?
Mooooooo: about 50%
HelloKit: Sure, CB
Mimi: not if I'm not pregnant
Countrybo: hell i got wierd stares before i had a wheel chair lol
Riverboat: lol
HelloKit: Do most looks come from kids or adults?
HelloKit: LOL
Riverboat: both
Countrybo: BOTH
DopeHat: both
Countrybo: atleast kids have enough guts to ask!
Mooooooo: most of mine come from kids
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Mooooooo: but adults make the dumbest comments
Mooooooo: Coral :o)
* Countrybo doesnt mid explainin to kids who ask
DopeHat: or they run and hide
coral`: hi Mooooooo :)
HelloKit: That's true, CB
Riverboat: hi Coral
HelloKit: LOL
Mimi: hello coral :o)
coral`: hi Riverboat :)
coral`: hi Mimi :)
Mimi: brb
*** Mimi has left irc (Leaving)
Countrybo: Hurry back, Mimi We'll miss you
HelloKit: Mooooooo, do they really or does it just seem that way because you expect them to know better?
Mooooooo: Nope, they really do
Mooooooo: The last comment was hiking up to Nevada Falls
Riverboat: they really do
DopeHat: try high school kids
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Mooooooo: I passed this old couple and one says to the other 'hey, that lil crippled boy is climbing the mountain'
HelloKit: Does anyone have any witty remarks to use on people who stare?
Mooooooo: slow down :o)
HelloKit: LOL How old were you?
HelloKit: Sorry, that was an accident.
Mooooooo: highschool kids are not as bad as adults
Mooooooo: the older they get, the worse they get
DopeHat: take a picture, it lasts longer
coral`: yeah
Pyroircii: Dan: that would be opposite here
Mooooooo: like CB said, at least little kids have the cahonies to ask
Riverboat: good one!
Countrybo: hey did god really give you such a dirty look?
coral`: old people talk and treat me like a little kid
DopeHat: that right
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Mooooooo: do they call ya brave?
Mooooooo: hi judi :o)
Mimi: hello judi :o)
Riverboat: old people should know better
judi: hi
coral`: yeah they should
Countrybo: one person said you have a lot to deal with lol like I have a choice???
Mooooooo: but they're set in thier ways
coral`: some younger ppl talk down to me too
Riverboat: I live in a big apartment building
Riverboat: lots of old people there, all they do is stare and 'goosip'
Riverboat: 'gossip' typo
HelloKit: I know what you mean coral... for the longest time my younger sis acted like she was in charge of me... as if I couldn't make my own decisions.
coral`: that's how i get treated
coral`: and store clerks talk sometimes like i'm a little kid
judi: what's the question?
Riverboat: I had a ex that did that
coral`: it's really irritating
Mooooooo: then when ya get mad, they think you're rude
Riverboat: treat me like a kid
HelloKit: judi, the question is:
HelloKit: Does anyone have any witty remarks to use on people who stare?
* Countrybo loves to zip down the store aisles in my
Riverboat: picture time people
coral`: 'keep your eyes to yourself'
Mooooooo: mine is 'you got a prob *sshole?'
HelloKit: I have to tell you guys this story... some of you may have already heard it.
Riverboat: good one
coral`: that's a good one Mooooooo
judi: People stare at my Rascal too
Countrybo: i like to just stare back and x my eyes lol
coral`: make a face at them
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Countrybo: actually lately i am just so darned happy to be in the damn store who cares if they stare!!
HelloKit: My friend Jessi was in the grocery store one day w/ her mom when she was about 2 yrs. old. This lady starts staring at her, and she looks at the lady and says, 'Hi, my name is Jessica Aaron. I have arthrogryposis multiplex congenita, what's your problem?' The lady's jaw hit the floor.
Riverboat: tell them 'Who you staring at, stupid'
Countrybo: lol
judi: People, especially clerks, talk to my husband instead of me, like I can't alk if I'm riding. He always says, She can talk.
Countrybo: why confroont them?
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Countrybo: just look at em and say yup you look pretty normal to me lol
DopeHat: lol
judi: I loke that Countrybo
DopeHat: i hate that
Countrybo: hey you want people to just turn their backs in stores and look the other way?
Mooooooo: I confront them to show them they are being rude
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Countrybo: sounds like alot of yas are out there makin enemies lol
Mooooooo: hey han :o)
Lao-tzu: hi everybody
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HelloKit: Has anyone ever come to you and asked a question or made a remark regarding your disability that you thought was stupid, strange, or even funny?
Lao-tzu: wooei big crowd tonight!
Riverboat: yes
Mooooooo: a) does it hurt
Countrybo: ya i get that alot
Mooooooo: b) Are you and your older sister twins?
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HelloKit: LOL
Countrybo: but now sometimes it does hurt :(
coral`: someone came up and rudely said 'what happened to you' in a demanding way and i said 'nothing'
Mooooooo: c) what kind of accident were you in?
HelloKit: I read one on AOL: 'Perhaps if you soak your legs in a nice hot bath, you'll walk.'
Countrybo: what happened to your legs
Mimi: I can't stand it when people who know I have epilepsy use the term 'epileptic fit' to describe someone who got really mad or lost it
Countrybo: that is sad
judi: There was an older clerk in a sewing section of our local Walmart who always stared. Finally she asked my husband, 'What's wrong with her' even though I had talked to her several times. I avoid going in there now.
Mimi: even if they don't know I have epilepsy, for that matter! :o)
Mooooooo: Well I told ya all about my car incedent
coral`: i didn't hear it Mooooooo
rowdie: me neither, moo
Mooooooo: the car deal wasnt very nice to me
Mooooooo: dealer
DopeHat: i've had people ask if i lift weights will i get stronger
Mooooooo: wanted to do the business with the friend who was with me
HelloKit: ROFL Keith
Countrybo: hey mimi i saw sopmethin neat on tv about epileptic kids havin trained dogs that can sense a seizure comin on and can warn the kid so they can lay down and prevent gettin hurt! i though that was neat!
Mimi: wow, that is cool!
Mooooooo: I went across the street and bought my new car from the other dealer and paid cash for it
Mimi: nice when you have fair warning :o)
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DopeHat: i had a teacher say i was lazy
Mimi: hello Ray1 :o)
coral`: what did you do say to the rude dealer Mooooooo
Mimi: sheesh
Countrybo: they said the animal can sense electrical or chemical changes that occur just befor a siezure
rowdie: I saw that too, countrybo, it was interesting
Mimi: that's amazing, wow
Lao-tzu: say Mooooooo, will you adopt me and buy me car?
Mooooooo: i didnt have to say anything :o)
Mimi: I dadn't heard of that
Countrybo: i was amazed
DopeHat: i've seen that
Countrybo: i just saw it this week
Mooooooo: lol
judi: My trouble is if I answer that I have arthritis I usually hear, oh everybody has arthritis. Like everyone has debilitating arthritis.
Countrybo: oh man that sucks
coral`: there is a guy that lives behind me with a seizure dog
Countrybo: that has to beverypainful
Mimi: uninformed
HelloKit: My mom gets that attitude too, judi. Ticks her off.
Countrybo: cool coral
judi: Yes itis countrybo.
Countrybo: maybe you could get some info for mimi?
Countrybo: maybe you could get some info for mimi? coral???
Char2: i have had peole ask if i realy need a wheelchair
judi: I've even had people tell me to go buy some ibuprofen!
Mimi: well, I havent had a grand mal in 7 years and I don't plan to start up again soon :o)
coral`: i have that too judi and they always say they never heard of arthritis putting someone in a w/c
* Char2 has Rhuematoid Arthritis (RA) and is in a
Countrybo: people ask me if i can walk at all
judi: Yea, I hear that too
Countrybo: Congrats mimi!
Mimi: thanks ;o)
HelloKit: Did anyone have a good comeback for a remark they received?
Countrybo: i have a niece that has atleast 3 grandmalls a week
rowdie: can
rowdie: opps
judi: that's terrible
Mimi: that's tough, CB
Countrybo: its tough but thats life eh?
judi: I need a good comeback
rowdie: can you guys see me?
Ray1: I have Moderate CP and I had a DMV clerk ask me 'what's the matter with your hand?'
Countrybo: yup rowdie
rowdie: thanks, countrybo
Char2: yes rowdie
judi: yes, rowdie
Countrybo: heheh
Riverboat: yes, rowdie
Lao-tzu: yes rowdie
rowdie: ok, thanks, ya'll
HelloKit: We met a kid on the bus who recovered from spinal meningitis and has 1-2 seizures a week.
coral`: tell them it's none of their business
* Countrybo thinks he just wanted attention lol j/k
Mimi: I've heard of kids having 75 per day
HelloKit: He had two during the trip, in fact. Thankfully they were both during rest stops.
Countrybo: oh man when they screened her for surgery they spent a weekend triggerin multiple siezuers in the hospital :(
Mimi: awww, poor thing
Countrybo: and she didnt qualify :(
rowdie: that's tough, cb
HelloKit: Oh God what a pain...
Countrybo: everytime they mess with her medications it messes her up
judi: My son had brain surgery when he was 16. He had a cyst in the temporal lobe. Before the surgery he had multiple seizures daily. Afterwards, not a one.
Mimi: it's hard for some people to find the right balance
Countrybo: sorry lol yall been thru this and worse i bet
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Mimi: heya Simon :o)
phoenyxx: sorry I am late
Riverboat: neurologists don't seem concerned at all
phoenyxx: :-)
HelloKit: Hey Simon.
phoenyxx: hey carly
Mimi: Simon, got a good comeback for a stupid comment?
Lao-tzu: hi Simon
judi: hi phoenyxx
phoenyxx: good comeback for a stupid comment? depends on the stupid comment :-)
*** Mooooooof has joined #Disabled
phoenyxx: people ask me if I can walk after I tell them I can't, I tell them, sure, just give me a ticket
phoenyxx: on the space shuttle :-)
Countrybo: ya they wanted another muscle biopsy on my boy so we drove 4.5 hours one way just for the other doc to say why? i dont think he needs one! geee why didnt they just phone each other?
Mimi: lol
*** Mooooooo has left irc (Local kill by Mooooooof (who ya gonna call?))
Mimi: that'll work
*** Mooooooof is now known as Mooooooo
HelloKit: What are the most common questions/comments made to people with disabilities?
phoenyxx: my favorite has always been, upon seeing my chair, 'how did YOU get a chair like that?'
coral`: 'why are you in a w/c?'
Mimi: people always ask me if I am 'under control' *g*
phoenyxx: I say something really sarcastic like, 'I am sorry, they said it was ok for me to get it.'
Char2: Whats wrong with you why the w/c
Countrybo: how about this one? the anethesiologist asked if i was a lawyer when he was puttin wifey under for c-sect. I said no but i can learn FAST if i have to!
judi: what's wrong with you
Mimi: I am always tempted to say, 'not at all!' and let them sweat it
HelloKit: LOL... no! I'm completely out of control!!! *grin*
HelloKit: LOL CB
Ray1: Or by the 'religious right' -- I can cure you!
Countrybo: i was nervouse as irt was what a dumb thing for him to say
phoenyxx: when someone asks why I'm in the chair, and I they seem a little nervous about it, I reply with 'Well, the intelligence briefing didn't cover this planet's high gravity' :-)
HelloKit: That would scare me, CB
Mooooooo: most comments i get are from the 'religious left'
rowdie: lol phoenyxx
phoenyxx: that puts them at ease when they hear me joking like that.
phoenyxx: :-)
Mooooooo: always wanting to help me and they cant take a hint
phoenyxx: religious left?
Ray1: Cute, mooooo.
Char2: i got use that one , Phoenoyx
Countrybo: hey I believe God can cure us in his own time and sometimes we serve a better purpose by reaching opthers thru our disability
HelloKit: Do you find that a lot of people tend to bring up religion when they meet someone with a disability?
Mooooooo: religious left, ammoral busibodies
judi: all the time
rowdie: my dad was in a wheelchair, when someone asked him questions like that, he always stuck out his hand to shake thiers and said 'glad you got to meet me'
phoenyxx: btw, delayed hellos to judi and Lao-tzu :-)
coral`: not a lot
phoenyxx: Carly, I've seen that happen sometimes.
Mimi: lol rowdie
phoenyxx: actually it's weird, I've actually gotten flak for talking about my disability in philosophical terms rather than simple clinical, technical terms.
judi: what do you mean
HelloKit: My friend Priscilla was on the sidewalk in her w/c waiting for her ride... this guy walks past her, stops, comes back to her, kneels by her chair and says, 'Can I talk to you about Jesus?'
Countrybo: Its a tough question we all ask our selves i get ...Why me God?
Ray1: It's not prevalent, it just sticks in my mind.
Lao-tzu: Simon, it's OK, laggard you :-)
rowdie: For sure, CB
phoenyxx: judi: for some reason, some people like talking about disability when I'm talking in straight technical terms, but when I discuss any 'feeling' about it, there's trouble.
Countrybo: you know theres alot of disabled people doin God's work
phoenyxx: Carly: I get the feeling some people think someone in a chair has become an atheist or something.
Countrybo: theres a lady missionary in malaysia handing out bibles from a wheel chair
judi: what, disabled people have feelings?
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phoenyxx: I am not an atheist, I'm an irreverent Catholic :-)
Countrybo: ya are disabled people realpeople? lol
phoenyxx: judi: I do anyway :-)
* Mooooooo is a single 33 year old Politically Incorrect
Countrybo: i am a recovering Catholic lol
Mooooooo: thats me :o)
Lao-tzu: I've had a guy wanting to get me into a MLM scheme for years now and the latest one he told me he was a bishop and asked me if I wanted to be cured. So I asked him how many in the chain before me :-)
HelloKit: phoenyxx: As if maybe atheism is what put them in the chair...
Countrybo: coool mooo me too
* Mimi is a practicing Catholic
Mooooooo: /:o)
judi: gosh, I thought we just sat around not hearing things or getting our feelings hurt
HelloKit: Do people tend to automatically brand you as a 'good' person because you have a disability?
Mooooooo: yes
Riverboat: Yes
coral`: i think so
phoenyxx: Carly: yes!
Mooooooo: Im brave, smart, and have a certain wisdom
rowdie: good, but insignificant
* Countrybo thinks God is not divided so i wont join a
HelloKit: ROFL
Lao-tzu: not the people I run over with my w/c
DopeHat: yes
Ray1: Not necessarily.
HelloKit: I like that attitude, CB
judi: I agree with roediw
Countrybo: lol or run into with my amigo lol
HelloKit: That's me too... I have my own set of beliefs.
phoenyxx: someone once was terribly offended with a violent segment on my access TV show, but what got me mad was that she wasn't bothered by the segment
phoenyxx: but that someone in a wheelchair could think of something so violent.
Countrybo: hek grioocery store aisles are like a freeway to an amigo lol
phoenyxx: that got me mad.
* HelloKit rolls her eyes.
phoenyxx: ...the skit was crude and smartass in nature, and I tried explaining to her that I've had a weird sense of humor long before I was in the chair.
judi: hard to reach top shelves though cb
Mimi: I volunteered at a center for the disabled and the lady was really suspicious of me until I mentioned that I had epilepsy, and then I was welcomed with open arms :o)
phoenyxx: and that wasn't impaired in the slightest :-)
Countrybo: ya it is lol funny i never had that trouble when i could walk hehe
* Countrybo is 6ft 3
* phoenyxx is 5ft 4
Countrybo: you had to be disabled to fit in?
HelloKit: That's like my mom... she thinks that anyone who volunteers for MDA must have a family member with MD.
judi: I think we get a little defensive Mimi. You can't SEE epilepsy.
Mimi: I guess she was screening me, and having epilepsy make me instantly 'ok' *g*
Countrybo: hey i am not bitter alot, of able bodied people have gone out of their way to help us out! like building a ramp!
Mimi: true, Judy, but I was volunteering, not joining the club
phoenyxx: yes, and many able bodied will serve the Party well in the future. :-)
Mimi: LOL
Countrybo: LOL
judi: I ran into that before my arthritis put me in the riders seat
Countrybo: actually i think its cool i can out shop my wife now lol
phoenyxx: Roosevelt had The New Deal, as President, I will dispense The Raw Deal :-)
HelloKit: Well Mimi, sometimes people are unsure of how you will treat the clients/patients... knowing you have a disability yourself makes you a little less likely to mistreat people, y'know?
HelloKit: At least in their minds.
Mimi: that's very true, Carly
Countrybo: true
rowdie: good point, kit
*** gordon4 has left irc (Leaving)
phoenyxx: hey, does anyone get an attitude from some people that you were a shallow person or a jerk before you were disabled?
Mimi: I got 20 questions on how much experience I had 'dealing with the disabled'
phoenyxx: then you became
phoenyxx: nice
phoenyxx: ?
judi: Countrybo, its hard to reach those shelves when you're 5'3' tall though
Countrybo: i bet judi!
phoenyxx: I am taller than someone here :-)
HelloKit: Hey, my graphics teacher in HS was only 4'11'
Countrybo: but ya know what judi when i could walk i was always happy to help out shorter people that way! now they help me lol being as them short people can reach higher than me now lol
Mimi: I had a riding teacher who was 4'9'
HelloKit: Since many people mean well when they say something funny, do you think anyone would be offended to know that we look at their remarks humorously?
Mooooooo: so was my spanish teacher
judi: We just learned my grandson has a growth disorder and will probably never reach 5'.
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Mooooooo: i cant help it if i roll over laughing
Mimi: some would, yeah...others might feel better knowing that
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Countrybo: well if you cant laff at yourself and your predicaments WHO CAN????
phoenyxx: People I've met are put at ease if they know I can laugh about things.
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Catz: good night I have to get ready for school tomorrow
phoenyxx: One guy asked me what street gang I was in, as a bad joke, and I told him he had 5 seconds to run.
rowdie: nite catz
Lao-tzu: I finally got my license to 'solo' with my KFOs in the apartment. Oooh, what a rush!, to be able to look the top shelf in the kitchen covert (sp?) eye to eye again. Then to take the bag of raisins and decide whether to drop them in the sinc or be adventurous and slowly place it on the counter.
Mimi: bye Catz!
Countrybo: laughter is a universal langyage even for people p
phoenyxx: I knew he was kidding, and he knew I was kidding.
Countrybo: of the same launguage lol
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Lao-tzu: nite Catz
HelloKit: Of all the remarks we have received from people, what is the funniest one you heard tonight, or that hasn't been mentioned?
Mooooooo: hmmmm
Raven_: am /I late Mimi?
Raven_: he
Countrybo: tough one
Mimi: kinda, Raven :o)
judi: 'Are you ok?'
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Raven_: totally forgoy
Raven_: forgot even
Lao-tzu: a mixed bag I think, can't make up my mind
coral`: once i was getting off a bus liket wearing sunglasses and a kid asked my friend if i was blind
Mimi: I liked the one about soaking your legs in warm water ;o)
HelloKit: What do you think belongs at the top of the top ten list?
Raven_: in a power-chair?
HelloKit: LOL coral
coral`: yeah
Countrybo: lol
coral`: bus lift i meant to say
Raven_: go figue <G>
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Mimi: hello Char :o)
Countrybo: welli sometimes drive like a blind man? lol
HelloKit: heh
Char2: hi mimi
judi: Wish I could drive
Ray1: When I was learning to walk on canes at age 16... I had a little kid stare at me and say to his friend, 'He must be broken.'
phoenyxx: One time I was wearing all black in my black (with silver trim) chair wearing black gloves and sunglasses and someone joked 'It's Dr. Strangelove'.
phoenyxx: rather funny actually :-)
rowdie: lol phoenyxx
Raven_: I did today, I'm hyped up on mini-thins
Mooooooo: lol
phoenyxx: I told them I was off to hassle UFO witnesses.
rowdie: kids are the best
phoenyxx: :-)
Countrybo: hehe i chipped out a hunk of the front deck on my cart shovelin snow. People see that and they get out of my way fast lol
* Mimi chuckles
judi: I lovve your attitude phoenyxx
Countrybo: lol
phoenyxx: judi: thank you :-)
Countrybo: i vote that as no.1 dr strangelove lol
rowdie: A kid asks me how come I walk the way I walk. I said I had polio. He sais COOL!
Countrybo: lol
HelloKit: LOL!
Mimi: lol
Countrybo: ya real cool lol
Raven_: cool?
HelloKit: BRB
Countrybo: Hurry back, HelloKit We'll miss you
Lao-tzu: there's a method to this madness yet!
Countrybo: one guy says he should get a cart he's tired of walkin I said i'll trade anyday!
Mimi: I've done that...someone said 'Ive got CP but it doesn't have me' and I said 'that's cool' meaning it was cool that it didn't have them, but I felt silly anyway
coral`: a lot of ppl that see me in my power chair say 'i need one of those'
phoenyxx: ack! see you all later! it's 9pm here!
Mimi: bye Simon! :o)
* phoenyxx is off to watch the season premeire of Law and
phoenyxx: :-)
rowdie: nite phoenyxx, take care
Countrybo: night dr
Lao-tzu: bi Simon
Countrybo: lol
judi: me too coral, like we just use them for fun
coral`: yeah
Mooooooo: bye simon
phoenyxx: glad I made you all laugh here, judi, glad you found my jokes funny :-)
Countrybo: ya we are to lazy to walk
phoenyxx: bye! :-)
judi: bye ohoenyxx
Mimi: at least someone did, Simon ;o)
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Mimi: j/k
HelloKit: back
Countrybo: Welcome Back HelloKit We missed you
Mimi: wb Carly :o)
HelloKit: I had to go tell Chris the 'cool' one... hehe
Countrybo: well folks its bed time
coral`: g'night CB
Raven_: night
rowdie: nite CB
judi: night cb
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Mimi: bye CB! :o)
HelloKit: Can anyone think of any topics for future top ten lists?
Mooooooo: not off the top of my head
Mooooooo: but i'll think about it
Mimi: whoops, me neither
judi: things we've had to give up
Char2: judi, what type of arthiritis do you have?
rowdie: brb
coral`: benefits of being disabled?
Raven_: bye
judi: rheumatoid
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HelloKit: I thought about that one, coralk.
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Lao-tzu: how about things you want to do?
HelloKit: coral
HelloKit: sorry
coral`: s'ok
Char2: judi, how long have you had RA
Ray1: I gotta go soon too, but I wanted to let you know I'm the guy you used to know as Capwriter.
Mooooooo: oh!!!!
Mooooooo: cool Cap
Mooooooo: /:o)
Mimi: lol
judi: yea, that's better Lao. 12 years, degenerative disk disease 16 years
Char2: judi, i have RA
coral`: the positive respnses we get from people
judi: hit new highs this summer. sed rate 130
coral`: i have RA too
Ray1: See you, mooooo, mimi. I'll drop by during the week. take it easy. Bye, all.
Mimi: bye Ray! :o)
Mooooooo: see ya ray
Lao-tzu: bi RAy
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Char2: i have had RA over 25 yrs
coral`: bye Ray
END