Think of Others Too

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lily
Posts: 15
Joined: 7 years ago

Think of Others Too

Post by lily » 7 years ago

Below are my definitions of two similar words:

Kind – Being generous and considerate
Nice – Being pleasant and likable.

Kindness is more inherent. People who are kind emphasize with others’ situations.  Someone who behaves this way does so because they know that it is the right thing to do. It is also a trait that can be learned.

Being nice is fairly easy to do, though sometimes a person has a personal motive for being that way. Occasionally the behavior is at the detriment of others.

Before I go any further I will say that I am a kind person, but I am not always a nice one.

It has been almost two years since I joined DRU and for the most part my experiences in the room have been positive.

Unfortunately, with any large group there will always be people who sometimes are neither kind nor nice. What's more, there will always be those who are shy and unsure, so it is inevitable that problems will happen.

Thankfully, DRU’s moderators keep a handle on any problems that do occur. That is WHEN they are made aware of them.

Though a question I keep asking is this: If something happens and you do not tell a moderator then how will the situation ever be resolved?

But I also know that there are some who do not wish to complain to a moderator, though they will talk with their DRU friends. This makes me wonder if DRU needs someone who can be the go between for those who are “uncomfortable� talking to a moderator.

Anyway, back to the issue of those who are rude, mean, or nasty toward others in the room. If you cannot be a kind person, then at least fake it and play the role of being nice. I know you can do it. It is easy.

Coll
Posts: 63
Joined: 7 years ago

Post by Coll » 7 years ago

Having a go between would be just another level of moderator.

I've seen times where what one person says to another could be considered not kind, but part the reason it wasn't "kind" was the person's in ability to empathise in that situation.  Would it then be fair to criticise because of a mental "disability"?

I'll be honest that there might be times I've come across as not kind.  Sometimes it's because I'm in so much pain I'm mad at the world.  Other times its because I don't understand.

One thing I've found about DRU is that I can have a disagreement with another member and yet still remain friends.  We can still give support to each other joke around together.  This a very special place I'm thankful for it.

dude2
Posts: 14
Joined: 9 years ago
Location: central wisconsin

Post by dude2 » 7 years ago

One can always PM a moderator........                      Dude

lily
Posts: 15
Joined: 7 years ago

Post by lily » 7 years ago

Know why I wrote that?  Because more and more people keep coming to me to complain about one thing or another, even though I keep telling them to tell a moderator, speak up, or IGGY whomever is causing them grief. Ad Nausea. I wish more people would tell a moderator, but am told that they do not think it will help.  ARG! I them to IGGY, and some do, some do not. Guess I am the conduit for some. Or as one called themselves, the poor defenseless gazelle in the room. Geesh.

Coll
Posts: 63
Joined: 7 years ago

Post by Coll » 7 years ago

I doubt that the persons that have complained to you would go to someone else for the very reasons they gave you.
Some people I've noticed only want people who agree with them allowed to state their opinions.

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