To the Easily Offended, The Overzealous And Other Complaints!

[TiGgEr]

To the easily offended, the overzealous and other complaints!

So lots of drama happening lately that I'm sure you are aware, I'm going to try and address as much as possible in a hope to clarify things, actions or inactions and the way of things!

The first thing I would like to address his criticism towards moderators for not doing their "jobs" may I remind everybody that the moderators are volunteers, many of which have their own problems, they are not babysitters, and this is not an elementary school playground!

Moderators are trusted to intervene at their own discretion and make judgement calls based on what is happening and who with, the main objective to keep the room free of troublemakers and keep drama to a minimum if possible. This being said we are a room which encourages free speech, we encourage discussions which sometimes get a little heated and in the spirit of free speech when people have grievances about certain things or other members, to a degree we let them voice their opinions as long as they do not go too far with being disrespectful or start name-calling. After all we are all adults and should be able to sort some things out ourselves. If the moderators were to jump on every single conversation that got a little bit heated or every time members exchanged cross words there would not be such freedom of speech and we would be accused of policing, people would resent not being able to speak freely, and the room would generally be a lot more uncomfortable and duller than it is, also this would place a lot more pressure on the moderators. We have always tried to cultivate a somewhat relaxed atmosphere that most seem to enjoy. But do not take this for granted and certainly do not take our tolerance for your freedom of speech as weakness!

Recently I have been told I should be removing people for having difficult and opposing opinions in discussions, this will never happen as long as those opinions are discussed in relative respect, in fact I encourage them, whether it be a current event in politics, something religious, rules of society or tastes in pop culture we should never be afraid or discourage healthy discussion with opposing ideas! The day we start doing this is the day we start solely talking about the weather and at which point we might as well close! Just because somebody has a different opinion to yours, even if they are wrong does not mean it cannot be discussed, somebody usually benefits from said discussions even if it is a silent onlooker, it exercises and challenges ideas, morality, thought and vocabulary!

If you do not like a particular discussion you have choices, you can engage and give your own opinion or you can place the people in the discussion on ignore, you can take yourself and maybe some others to one of the other rooms or you can leave and come back later or you can open a game of solitaire and distract yourself for the duration of the discussion, but please do not ask them to stop just because you cannot handle what they are talking about, this is a selfish act, we should not have to cater to your individual sensitivities regarding discussion, nobody should be afraid of discussion, discussions, the exchange of ideas and opinions should be encouraged!

Regarding liars, the rules say "2. Do Not Lie!  If you are not disabled, do not say that you are.  Do not lie about the disability you have. We are friendly and compassionate people but we do not tolerate liars". So mostly it is referring to lying about having a disability, considering this is a chat room for people with disabilities, it is a key point not to lie about!

Now we all know there are harmful lies, and slightly more innocent lies commonly known as white lies, and I want to remind everybody that this is the Internet, it is full of creeps, perverts, sexual predators, horny people and opinionated assholes! This may lead to certain members to hide certain aspects of their true identity for safety or other reasons, and as long as they remain small discrepancies we can and should overlook these with the understanding that this is the Internet! Nobody swears to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth when they enter, yes we do expect them to be moderately truthful about who they are but as I say, this is not a black and white rule, minor discrepancies especially when confessed by the person when they feel more comfortable can be overlooked. It is also up to Administration to make judgements on said discrepancies on an individual basis to see if action is required, if you cannot live with this I suggest you shut down your computer because generally this is the way of the Internet!

I have also been told I should ban people for being intoxicated, and for posting erroneous links, let me address these individually.

Intoxication. There are various levels of intoxication, there are various sources of intoxication, many of our members are on very strong pain medication which can have similar effects to alcohol, some of our members medicate with medicinal marijuana, some medicate with alcohol, and some just like a drink every now and then to help them relax.

Any and all of these situations has to be judged on an individual basis as and when they occur, just because somebody is intoxicated does not mean they require removal, telling bad jokes does not require removal, not being able to understand everything that is being conveyed, does not require removal. Remember you can always ignore anybody for any reason, including if you feel they are intoxicated.

Anybody that is intoxicated that crosses the line into becoming an asshole will be treated like all other assholes but results may vary depending on the moderator present and how they wish to address the problem. Just because you do not see anything being said, does not mean nothing is being said.
Please note I will not separate different types of intoxication, they all lead to impairment, if I was to ban somebody for being intoxicated by alcohol, I have to apply the same rules and judgement to those intoxicated by prescription medication as well.

Erroneous links. Are you kidding me? Seriously? You want to be in that kind of room where we ban people for posting a link for somebody which may not be exactly what they were looking for? Even if it is completely wrong, the burden is not on the person supplying the link, they voluntarily took the time and effort to "try" and find information for the person asking, when the person asking could have used Google just as easily! It is up to the person asking the questions and seeking the information to review any links and information given and could use for themselves, what is applicable to their situation discarding what is not, and erroneous links falls under the category of not applicable and being discarded!

This being said, I encourage, to those who post links thinking they are being helpful, not to just post the first thing they find on Google and to actually quickly review the article to make sure it is relevant before posting the link. If you do not really know anything about the topic being asked, it may be best for you to leave it to others who have a better understanding if they are present to help save confusion. But this is a suggestion, not a rule!

If I am to ban one person for posting links, I have to then everybody, because nobody can guarantee every single links that they provide is exactly what the person is looking for, we are not professionals, we do not claim to be, we try our best voluntarily!

I want to finish up with just a couple more things, long-term members will always be given a little bit more flexibility on the rules then newer members, this may seem unfair to newer members and the reason is because long-term members have usually already integrated themselves into and established that generally they are able to follow the rules and get along in a social group such as ours, the fact that they are a long-time member proves this. Those who cannot integrate and get along in a social groups such as ours do not last long for obvious reasons.

When I ban somebody that appears to be a perfect gentleman or lady, I have done so with good reason, going on evidence you may be unaware of, having consulted other chat room members and moderators, and using over 30 years of combined instinct and experience! Ted Bundy was said to be a perfect gentleman, this did not change the fact that he was a serial killer!

So please believe me when I ban somebody, it was for a reason, I get nothing positive from banning people except the well-being of the room, on the contrary, I usually get complaints!

Oh, and one last thing, please stop quoting me and the other moderators the rules, we are quite familiar with them!

That's it for now, as usual comments are welcome below!

[Ragman]

Cool. I think. Long post, lost concentration a few time reading it. Thanks T

[Ghost]

Very good post,and I think the mods are doing a great job,and sometimes(?) a thankless job.