Disabilities-R-Us

Okay, I just heard a new rumor from the mill.

About 4 days ago I received a Facebook friend request from a woman I did not know.  Unlike most people, this one did not do me the common courtesy of sending me any type of message (Facebook or room) telling me who she was.  I had no idea who she was.  When I receive these requests, I NEVER ask via Facebook because when an unknown person sends a message, it goes into the receivers "other" box which most people never check or even know it exists.  Simply said, it's a waste of time to send them because the odds of getting a reply is slim to none.

I did notice that this person has other people from the chat room on her friends list, so, I did what I have always done and asked the people of the room if they recognized the name.  I did not see any public responses.

A few seconds later I got an angry PM from a woman who wanted to know why I gave out her name in public.  I explained.  She asked me the exact question again.  I gave the same answer.  She got angry, left, and I have not seen or thought of her since.

Now lets sort the bullshit from the reality.

1. At no point did I publicly connect the persons real name with her nick.  There is no way I could have done this because I didn't know who she was or what her nick was.  THAT IS WHY I WAS ASKING!  Come on people, this isn't rocket science here.
2. This person has already outed herself by virtue of the fact she has friends from the room on her friends list and she has given her home phone number to members of the room.  This can only happen because SHE first disregarded the safety warning given to her and everyone, every single time they enter the room.

Yet, I am the bad guy and the rumors fly.

I came back to the room because I needed the friendship of others after losing my Amber.  What do I get?  The same people stirring up the same shit.

I've gotten so tired of people treating me like I am the enemy that I have been tempted to start acting like they say I do, but that is just not who I want to be. 

I will be taking another long break from the room.

Daniel

So more rumors don't get started, here is the log of the private message I got AFTER I inquired about the name in the room.  I have blocked out her name.

**** BEGIN LOGGING AT Thu Feb 19 20:45:45 2015
Feb 19 20:45:45 Private conversation with ANONYMOUS.
Feb 19 20:45:45 ANONYMOUS: daniel, that is me
Feb 19 20:45:51 Daniel: ah ok
Feb 19 20:46:36 ANONYMOUS: i friended you on facebook, is that okay????  you said, never say your real name in the room and i freaked out for a sec
Feb 19 20:46:49 Daniel: yep, just had to make sure
Feb 19 20:47:19 ANONYMOUS: oh good, wow, please don't mention my real name out there again, ok?
Feb 19 20:47:54 Daniel: no prob
Feb 19 20:48:31 ANONYMOUS: ok, you gave me a heart attack
Feb 19 20:48:55 Daniel: lol sorry
Feb 19 20:53:45 ANONYMOUS: daniel, why did you shout out my name like that while i just happened to be in the room???  don't you know who is who since this is your site?  wow
Feb 19 20:54:03 Daniel: it doesn't tell me anyones name
Feb 19 20:54:18 Daniel: i just saw your friend request and didn't know who you were
Feb 19 20:54:34 ANONYMOUS: why didn't  you contact me on facebook then?
Feb 19 20:55:03 Daniel: ive done that in the past and people don't usually answer
Feb 19 20:56:11 ANONYMOUS: why not just respond on facebook instead of a shout out on here then?  that's my question
Feb 19 20:56:19 Daniel: ive done that in the past and people don't usually answer
Feb 19 20:56:50 ANONYMOUS: are you just going to copy and paste answers to me?  ok
Feb 19 20:57:06 Daniel: you asked me the same question
Feb 19 20:58:02 ANONYMOUS: thanks for that
Feb 19 20:59:19 *** ANONYMOUS has quit
**** ENDING LOGGING AT Thu Feb 19 21:57:38 2015

And just so there are no rumors of how I know that this person is giving out her private phone number to people in the room, this is from the main (public) room on Feb 12, 2015.  Again, I have made the names anonymous.

[15:52:37] <PERSON_2> ANONYMOUS did you try to reach me?
[15:52:51] <ANONYMOUS> yes i did PERSON_2 but it disconnected or something
[15:53:29] <PERSON_2> yeah I tried getting you back, ANONYMOUS, the phone kept going dead
[15:53:47] <ANONYMOUS> wow PERSON_2!  i am in a dead zone or something
[15:53:56] <PERSON_2> lmao

Daniel

I am sorry that you have to deal with that, and that feel that being away from the room is the best way to deal with it. I feel that you are a very sensitive person, and in this world, this must be difficult. I hope you would reconsider and give the most of us the pleasure of your company.

Daniel
I understand your taking a break from the chat room and u will be so missed. I was just getting to know u and respect and like u and i hope this is not a permeant  break from the chat room. We need u Daniel and am so very sorry this has happened. We have all felt the pain of rumors and character assassination and  I am so sorry this happened at this time to you. It is  unjust and cruel and it angers me this has happened to you. we should be very grateful that you started this room in the first place because we all need it and you have done a great service for all of us. Please do not stay away on a permanent basis and do come back. Please do not let this incident jade you or allow you to become jaded and bitter. None of us can't appreciate the pain that you feel in the overall of your situation. I understand that you are  a very sensitive person and so this has deepened your pain. Please know that we love you and are glad and grateful that you are back. Again I am so sorry that this is happening to you. Karen AKA kay.

Understandable Daniel  but,    come on in.   

I am still very new to all of this but was once the creator and moderator for a large home schooling group in my area.  No matter what you do or how hard you try to maintain civility and be "the leader" there will always be at least one person who has a few screws loose; if possessing any screws at all for that matter.  But I always tried to give that person the benefit of the doubt, and like Daniel, tried to get it all straightened out as quickly as possible.  But sometimes it does not matter what you do:  Sometimes it's just their personality, in that they like to cause trouble, regardless, or do have some mental instability.  Sometimes it's the meds being taken, and I sure can relate to this option.  Daniel needed a break from the mess, and this is what one has to do now and then, even if this is the person who not only started a group, but also is the moderator.  One can still maintain control of the group without always being directly involved, and oftentimes I found that this was the case.  I needed to step back and just make sure that the facts were present to all concerned and any person who kept being "bad" was first warned about their behavior, and if they continued they were removed from the group.  So Daniel, you keep doing what you need to do, and those of us who appreciate, and care, will not let some incorrect fact muddy the waters.