Obituary for Pillsbury Doughboy
Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 9:12 pm
Dear friends, it is with a sad heart that I must tell you the following news:
The Pillsbury Doughboy recently died from a severe yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack,
Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The gravesite was piled high with flours
as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who "never really knew how much he was kneaded". Doughboy rose quickly in show business but his later life was filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a
"smart cookie" , wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, even as a crusty old man, he was considered a roll model for millions.
Toward the end it was thought he'd rise once again but he was no tart. Doughboy is survived by his second wife, PlayDough. They have two children and one in the oven.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for 20 minutes.
The Pillsbury Doughboy recently died from a severe yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack,
Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The gravesite was piled high with flours
as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who "never really knew how much he was kneaded". Doughboy rose quickly in show business but his later life was filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a "smart cookie" , wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, even as a crusty old man, he was considered a roll model
for millions.Toward the end it was thought he'd rise once again but he was no tart. Doughboy is survived by his second wife, PlayDough. They have two children and one in the oven.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for 20 minutes.