Disabilities-R-Us

Created by and for people with physical disabilities.

Accepting Your Disability

Aug 21, 1997

This is an archival transcript of one of our past meetings. We don't have scheduled topical meetings anymore, but we're not opposed to the idea of bringing them back if someone is willing to commit to hosting them on a "long term" basis.

Participants already present:
  Disabled ([email protected])
  Pei
  HelloKit ([email protected])
  phoenyxx
  Mooooooo ([email protected])
  medad
  DopeHat ([email protected])
  nate__
  CincyKid
  jody-
  Capwriter
  Mimi_ ([email protected])
  ChanServ ([email protected])
  James---
  Mooooooo via Telnet ([email protected])
*** James--- is now known as James
*** DB2 has joined #disabled
jody-: AND..... Fleetwood Mac is not coming near me for a concert :(
Mimi_: sorry to hear that jody
Mooooooo: Howdy db2!
HelloKit: ARE WE READY TO START?
jody-: how about you? how's trix up in the great north?
Mimi_: hi DB2 :o)
phoenyxx: yeah...I missed a cool concert Sunday because I had to use all my money on a class I needed to take this fall
Mimi_: oh, just dandy :o)
phoenyxx: .
Mimi_: what concert Simon?
jody-: please...... registration is next week...
jody-: how's the hubby?
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CincyKid: lead on carly
DopeHat: hi sherri
Mimi_: hi sherri :o)
phoenyxx: Mimi: Queensryche
sherri: hi all
Mimi_: he's fine, babysitting right now :o)
jody-: I LOVE Queensryche!
Mimi_: ack
phoenyxx: jody: COOL! :-)
jody-: babysitting?
DB2: hello from Alaska
Mimi_: he's watching Felix for me
Mimi_: Felixsitting, we call it :o)
jody-: how's the munchkin?
HelloKit: OKAY EVERYONE, THIS IS MY FIRST MEETING USING DRAGONDICTATE, SO BE PATIENT WITH ME...
DopeHat: did that work carly
Mooooooo: Hi sherri :o)
* Mooooooo is ready!!!
Pei: did i miss the meeting?
Pei: :(
Pei: oops
* phoenyxx is getting the heat sheild up!
Pei: DARN IT
Pei: I DID!
HelloKit: CALM DOWN, DANIEL...
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sherri: did i miss the meeting?
* Pei cries cuz he missed the meeting.
jody-: it hasn't even started...
Pei: it hasn't?
Pei: great... i'm just in time
jody-: no pei...
DopeHat: no you didn't pei
HelloKit: WE'RE JUST STARTING NOW, PEI.
Pei: OK HELLOKIT :)
Pei: hehe.
jody-: what is dragondictate?
Mimi_: Hello from Quebec :o)
sherri: good
Pei: this is actually my first meeting.
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DopeHat: act like a man pei
phoenyxx: jody- voice recognition system
jody-: ????
sherri: hi mimi
phoenyxx: jody- dragondictate is a voice recognition system
jody-: you can talk instead of type?
Mooooooo: Hi GSW
GSW: hi
HelloKit: FOR THOSE OF YOU MOOOOOOO DON'T KNOW, DRAGONDICTATE IS VOICE RECOGNITION SOFTWARE THAT ALLOWS ME TO SPEAK TO THE COMPUTER AND IT WILL TYPE FOR ME.
DopeHat: hi gsw
phoenyxx: joy- yeah. although I've never used it personally
HelloKit: 'WHO DON'T KNOW' THAT IS
HelloKit: LOL
Mooooooo: lol
GSW: HelloKit: what didability do you have?
jody-: I could use that for my papers this fall..... typing is killing me now...
* Mooooooo knows all
sherri: cow
Pei: lol Moooooo
jody-: Mimi.... how's the munchkin?
* Pei can believe that
* HelloKit has arthrogryposis multiplex congenita... AMC is
Mimi_: *LOL* works great ;o)
GSW: I'm a C/5 quad
sherri: hi helokit
Pei: :)
HelloKit: LOL... I'M LAUGHING TO HARD TO TALK NOW!
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jody-: Mims... I taught 20 6-year-old little boys today... I want girls when I have kids..
Mimi_: sorry Jody I'm lagged major here, it's all coming in spurts...the munchkins fine :o)
Pei: jody- LOL :)
phoenyxx: jody- are you a teacher?
DopeHat: ewwwwww mimi
Mimi_: lol
jody-: sort of....
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HelloKit: ANYWAY... SINCE WE ARE ON THE SUBJECT OF WHAT DISABILITIES WE HAVE, HERE IS MY FIRST QUESTION...
jody-: okay.... shoot, Carly
phoenyxx: go Carly....
HelloKit: HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE CONGENITAL OR HEREDITARY DISABILITIES, AND HOW MANY HAVE ACCIDENT OR INJURY-RELATED DISABILITIES?
jody-: I have both....
* Pei has MD, i guess it would be hereditary,,,,,
Mooooooo: Mine is congenital
medad: injury related
Mimi_: I've always had epilepsy, but I didn't always know it
phoenyxx: I have neither...not in a literal sense.
Mimi_: what is yours then Simon?
Capwriter: I have congenital CP.
HelloKit: MINE IS CONGENITAL
jody-: my RA has been made worse by the 2 accidents I had at work
phoenyxx: Part of my condition is congenital....and the actual disability is from a built up-effect of the orthopedic problems I was born with....compounded by unknown effects of surgeries when I was younger.
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phoenyxx: I've been in the wheelchair since March 11, 1993 7:05 am
Mooooooo: wb Keith
phoenyxx: central time
DB2: has the meeting started yet?
HelloKit: THAT'S SORT OF BOTH THEN, ISN'T IT SIMON?
Mooooooo: yep :o)
Pei: phoenyxx: that narrows it down.
phoenyxx: carly yeah but it's so complicated to explain sometimes.
Mooooooo: the meeting has started :o)
sherri: i was born thiz way.
Pei: the meeting has started!
Pei: :)
*** DopeHat has left irc (Killed (NickServ (Ghost command used by MrMojo)))
phoenyxx: it's easier to tell people when they ask about the chair that the intelligence briefing didn't cover this planet's gravity :-)
*** MrMojo is now known as DopeHat
jody-: LOL
Mooooooo: lol
phoenyxx: :-)
Pei: :)
Pei: lol
HelloKit: DO YOU FEEL THAT ACCEPTING YOURSELF AND ACCEPTING YOUR DISABILITY ARE THE SAME THING?
* Mimi_ chuckles
* phoenyxx is a UFO enthusiast :-)
Pei: .
Mimi_: No, I don't feel that way Carly
Mooooooo: Depends on what you mean by accepting our disability
Mimi_: the two are totally separate
Pei: me neither.
jody-: no..... I accept my talents and faults.... sometimes I can't (okay mostly) accept my disability
Mimi_: well, not totally, but mostly :o)
nate__: i agree with mimi
Mooooooo: which leads to the question... what do you mean?
* Mimi_ will think before she responds next time ;o)
* Pei never thinks ;)
*** kath123 has left irc (Leaving)
phoenyxx: I can accept the disability itself but after 4 years I still get fustrated about the small or secondary details more than I get fustrated about the disability itself.
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sherri: guess it cengg
HelloKit: WELL, I THINK OF ACCEPTING MY DISABILITY AS ACCEPTING THAT I AM DISABLED AND THAT IT ISN'T GOING TO CHANGE.
phoenyxx: altough I can accept my limitations and still do alot despite them.
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HelloKit: I DON'T SPEND ALL MY TIME WISHING THERE WAS SOME WAY TO 'FIX' ME.
jody-: I haven't gotten to that stage yet, Carly. My RA has just gotten this bad in the past year
*** DB2 has left irc (Thanks for the advise!!!)
phoenyxx: carly: neither do I.
Mooooooo: Ok, I can understand that
Mooooooo: Hi Jolene :o)
DopeHat: i wish there was a way to fix me
jody-: so do I Keith
Mooooooo: me too
Jolene: Hi everyone. I'm new to chat--so please excuse me if I mess up!
sherri: i argree carly
HelloKit: IS THERE ANYONE HERE WHOSE PARENTS' LIFESTYLE CONTRIBUTED TO THEIR DISABILITY?
phoenyxx: not me.
jody-: can I blame my mother's genes?
Mooooooo: No prob Jolene, welcome to IRC
Mimi_: I never wanted to 'fix' me, I just wanted to ignore the whole thing
DopeHat: no mine
* Pei wisheds there was some way to fix me, but i also
Capwriter: nor mine.
phoenyxx: although I did briefly ask my parents awkward questions like that when I was younger.
nate__: my mom smoked
Mooooooo: Thats a two-headed question
Mimi_: hello Jolene :o)
Mimi_: and of course I didn't want anyone else to know :o)
sherri: nor mine
jody-: it's my mom's chromosomes' fault
Mooooooo: they can contribute to it by genes, or they can contribute to it by being parents who do too much for you
Jolene: I can't see where my parents' lifestyle contributed in any way to my being disabled.
HelloKit: IT IS A DIFFICULT QUESTION... ESPECIALLY SINCE SOME PEOPLE MAY NOT KNOW THE CAUSE OF THEIR DISABILITY.
phoenyxx: My dad was in the air force and I had this weird idea that somehow there was fallout from atomic tests. but I was born in 1970 and they stopped the tests in the early 60's
DopeHat: i accept my disability but in a way i don't
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Mimi_: don't worry, Jolene, you're already doing fine :o)
HelloKit: BUT I LOOK AT MY YOUNGER SIBLINGS, WHO ARE ADOPTED AND ALL HAVE FETAL ALCOHOL EFFECTS...
Mooooooo: hi Iridian :o)
* Pei gets frustrated at the little things i can't do and
sherri: hi jolene
Jolene: My medical problems were not to my knowledge inherited from my parents.
Iridian: Hello Moooooooo
Mimi_: nope, not me
Iridian: how are you..
jody-: that's different Carly..... in that case the parent is to blame
DopeHat: i agree pei
James: s/join
James: ewps
sherri: me to pei
James: :)
HelloKit: ALL OF THE THINGS THEY GO THROUGH COULD HAVE BEEN PREVENTED.
Mooooooo: Mine was caused by my mothers womb being to small
Mooooooo: as was my next oldest sister
Jolene: Hi sherri, iridan
Mimi_: ping me
HelloKit: MOOOOOOO, DOES YOUR SISTER HAVE AMC TOO?
Pei: Mimi_: if you ping me it will be the same thing, and you will get a time :)
jody-: mine was caused by my mother coming from generations of inbred anglos
CincyKid: i did about 2 mins ago mimi, nothing back yet!
Mooooooo: yes, 1 sister does
Mooooooo: 3 others dont
sherri: how u r jolene?
James: amc?
DopeHat: i feel like everything is going backwards
Mooooooo: AMC is a condition characterized by multiple joint contractures at birth. More info: http://www.sonnet.com/avenues/
James: oh
James: k
CincyKid: Kit- What does any of that have to do with accepting your disability?
Mooooooo: /:o)
Pei: (mJ) CTCP PING reply from Mimi_:72.501 seconds
HelloKit: JOHN: RESENTMENT MAYBE?
CincyKid: Mimi 4 mins 55secs
CincyKid: Will that help to accept it?
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phoenyxx: Mimi- 108 seconds
HelloKit: HOW DO YOU FEEL YOUR LIFE WOULD BE DIFFERENT IF YOU WERE NOT DISABLED?
sherri: hi advent
Advent: Hi sherri
jody-: resenting parents won't make things better...... sure I'd love to feel great like my brother and sister but it isn't mom and dad's fault.
jody-: just the roll of the dice
DopeHat: it would be alot different
Mooooooo: I have no idea
phoenyxx: carly: for me that is hard to say...I've done alot since I've been in the chair. it's hard to tell what would have been different.
Capwriter: It would be easier getting a job.
jody-: I would be able to drive stick shift...... and go to culinary school....
* Pei thinks that that is a hard question...
phoenyxx: although I can say I might not have been as focused on things.
phoenyxx: I know that sounded totally weird.
jody-: I would become the female Mario Andretti
nate__: my life would be way diferent
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Capwriter: Maybe a better social life.
Jolene: Thanks for the info Mimi
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sherri: oh a lot but god made me like this for a reason,
* Pei thinks that his school life would be better.....
HelloKit: SOMETIMES I WONDER IF I WOULD ALREADY BE DRIVING IF IT WEREN'T FOR MY DISABILITY.
Mimi_: my pleasure Jolene :o)
jody-: I wouldn't have been fired.....
HelloKit: I THINK ABOUT DRIVING ALOT... I'M NOT SURE WHY IT'S SO IMPORTANT TO ME.
nate__: kit are you starting to drive
* Pei is 14, and can drive any time now.... but i would
jody-: because, Carly, driving means FREEDOM
Jolene: Why can't you drive, if I might be so nosy? I'm not able to drive because of seizures.
Mooooooo: My friend Mike is 34 and still doesnt drive
HelloKit: NOT YET, NATE.
DopeHat: lots of things would be better for me
nate__: kit: because it gives you moor indepenace
phoenyxx: I am 27 (a little under a month ago :-) ) and don't drive...not the disability but because I've never been able to afford it.
medad: I am disabled because of work injury, I am 45 married with two kids. I hate not being able to work .
Mimi_: One thing that would be better for me is I wouldn't have to worry about my medication affecting my children :o(
HelloKit: GOOD POINT, MIMI.
phoenyxx: yes mimi, excellent point!
jody-: that will be an issue for me too some day...... my RA medication is no good for fetuses
Mimi_: I had to decide whether to have tham or not, and I decided to go for it
DopeHat: the only bad thing i can think of that i wouldn't have met some good people
sherri: understandable mimi
HelloKit: AFTER LIVING WITH A DISABILITY, IF THERE WAS SOME WAY A DOCTOR COULD COMPLETELY CORRECT IT, WOULD YOU WANT THEM TO?
medad: In my case I wonder if being dead wouldn't be better for everyone involved. Depression is part of my disability
jody-: yes....
Mooooooo: Yes, 100%
phoenyxx: Carly: yes.
phoenyxx: totally absolutely!
Pei: Yes
Jolene: Accepting disability is very difficult for me because I have always been a very active person and career oriented, and then cancer and brain tumor and seizures did me in.
DopeHat: YES
Mimi_: it's hard, huh, Jody?
Capwriter: Definitely.
Mimi_: YES!!
phoenyxx: Jolene- I am sorry to hear about that.
jody-: yeah..... they have 'recommended' that I think twice about having children.
Mooooooo: thats hard
HelloKit: YOU GUYS WILL PROBABLY THINK I'M WEIRD, BUT MY ANSWER WOULD PROBABLY BE NO.
Mimi_: why???
Pei: hmmm
phoenyxx: even if I was told there was a spinal fusion or some other repair that could be done on my lower spine but it might not work I think I could accept that risk.
nate__: mine whould be no to
Capwriter: Explain, carly.
HelloKit: I'M NOT REALLY SURE WHY...
* Pei goes with maybe.....
jody-: the meds I'm on.....
Mimi_: what does it do, Jody?
Mooooooo: Why nate?
jody-: they don't even know yet..... too soon to tell what effects it will have
Jolene: Lately I have been climbing the walls because I am housebound until my Neurologist gets my meds for seizures under control--no driving until he gives me the ok.
phoenyxx: again I am sorry
nate__: i not sure eather but it whould chang my hole life
Jolene: Thanks.
jody-: plus..... RA goes into remission when a woman is pregnant - something to do with the hormones.....
sherri: as aa matter of fact i'm facing that now.
HelloKit: I THINK IT'S BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT I'M USED TO. I DON'T THINK I COULD HANDLE THAT DRASTIC A CHANGE.
jody-: and then after the birth usually experiences a full blown flare up that can last months....
Jolene: Sometimes we don't have a choice!
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Mooooooo: I've looked at corrective surgery but it was dangerous
Capwriter: Carly, I think you'd adjust.
Mooooooo: Hi Gordon!
phoenyxx: I promised a counselor I was talking to in '95 that I'd be walking by January 2000 no matter what. now it's only 2 and a half years to go.
Mimi_: dangerous how?
Jolene: Hi gordon!
HelloKit: CHRIS AND I WERE JOKING LAST NIGHT... IF I SUDDENLY COULD FEED MYSELF, MY AIM WOULD BE OFF AND I WOULD BE THROWING FOOD OVER MY SHOULDER.
phoenyxx: something must come along soon!
Mimi_: jody could you go off it while pregnant, and then go back on?
Mooooooo: lol
DopeHat: well i could live a longer life without my MD
gordon4: Just droped in to say hello
jody-: Maybe, Carly...... it makes a difference whether you have had it all your life or just 'acquired' it.....
Mimi_: heya gordon :o)
Pei: lol
phoenyxx: i had no idea....really.
phoenyxx: truly sorry
HelloKit: YES JODY, I AGREE.
jody-: yep... besides, Mimi - I rarely listen to my doctors now... why would I start with something like that :)))
phoenyxx: I honestly never realized how bad things really were. Sometimes I just don't pick up on things like that.
Mimi_: cool jody :o)
* phoenyxx never listens to doctors.
phoenyxx: :-)
Mimi_: I can't go off mine, a seizure would be more dangerous for the baby than the medicine
jody-: very true.....
Jolene: Having 'acquired' a disability to me is much harder than if I had been born with a disability. I wouldn't yearn for my former life as I do now.
sherri: is anybody seeing me??
jody-: same here Jolene
phoenyxx: Mimi- were you on the medication when you had Felix?
Mooooooo: yes sherri :o)
jody-: we see you sherri...
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DopeHat: i do sherri
Mimi_: yep, all the time, Simon, and he's fine :O)
Jolene: I see you sherri.
sherri: ok guys
jody-: he's a cute little bugger Simon
phoenyxx: Mimi: I think this time things will be ok too :-)
Jolene: Hi James.
Mimi_: my medication quadruples the chances of my baby having Spina Bifida though
medad: sherri I see you here
phoenyxx: jody: yeah :-)
Mimi_: yeah, I think so too, Simon. Thanks :o)
phoenyxx: no problem.
Mimi_: :o)
CincyKid: Is there anything you would miss, that you wouldn't be doing now or something you really like doing, that you don't think you would have discovered if not for your disability?
Mimi_: YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
jody-: you guys..... :)
HelloKit: WHAT, IF ANYTHING, DO YOU THINK LIVING WITH A DISABILITY HAS TAUGHT YOU?
DopeHat: hmmmmmmm
jody-: jinx
* Pei wishes once and awhile everyone would call everyone
Mimi_: JINX!
Mimi_: darn
jody-: lol
Mimi_: I owe you a beer :o)
jody-: yep
jody-: Pei, kiddo..... we're just talking to everyone
Mooooooo: Humility
Mimi_: ok, Pei, NP
phoenyxx: carly- I've learn to be a little more patient, and to know how to sometimes give myself a break when I'm really into something :-)
sherri: i heard about a surgery that may help me.
Pei: jody-: :) hehe. i just don't know everyones name :_
Jolene: Learning to live with my disabilities has made me slow down and be more patient and tolerant of others. I have had to learn to rely on other people--which is still very hard for me.
jody-: I hate relying on others!!!
phoenyxx: I've also in a weird way, to be more of an individual than I was before.
gordon4: Stop worrying about tomorrow. Take care of today. This is what I've done for 47 years.
phoenyxx: comes from making sure people see me and not just the chair. :-)
DopeHat: patients
sherri: me to jody
jody-: Pei... it is kind of a free for all.. :)
phoenyxx: jody: I can relate a little to that. I'm great with video taping and editing but still need help with little things like carrying the camera or getting a ride to shoot someplace.
Jolene: Relying on others is degrading for me because i want to be independent again.
phoenyxx: I know that's not much to say .
Capwriter: Jody, you and I r kindred spirits. I hate relying on others.
Mimi_: that's a tough one for me
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HelloKit: KNOW WHAT I'VE LEARNED? 'TRUST NO ONE.' KINDA LIKE THE X-FILES.
phoenyxx: good one carly :-)
Jolene: Hi Stinkynut!
Mimi_: wow...how so Carly?
jody-: the worse thing is when my baby sister sees me having trouble and gently steps in and gives me a hand. I diapered this kid!!!!
stinkynut: whats up jolene
gordon4: You people have a lot to learn. Trust no one you are not thinking straight.
DopeHat: i hate being so damn dependant on others
Capwriter: Carly, you're being cynical!
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ShyGirl17: hi :-)
Mooooooo: i have to agree with gordon
Jolene: I've found that even though I have to rely on people, I still really don't trust most people--they say one thing and do another.
gordon4: Thanks
Mooooooo: Hi Shy :o)
nate__: carly are you saying that it is hard to find people to trust
ShyGirl17: how are you??? :-)
HelloKit: MIMI: I'VE BEEN DEALT ALOT OF CRAP BY THE PEOPLE CHILDREN ARE ALWAYS TOLD THEY CAN ALWAYS TRUST.
Mooooooo: doing great :o)
sherri: aman dopehat
ShyGirl17: that's good :-)
Mimi_: Hi Shygirl :o)
phoenyxx: For the record I feel like a total poser here right now. Despite my limitations I managed to 'salvage' alot of my old life, plus what I've accomplished since I've been in the chair.
ShyGirl17: hi mimi
Mooooooo: Like who Carly?
Capwriter: Hi, Shy!
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Pei: i hate the medaphor 'Learn to live with the cards that we've been delt.'
jody-: so have I Simon.... but I don't like the limitations that I do have now.
Pei: that maked me mad
Pei: :)
phoenyxx: In other words, I for the most part still get to do the things I want to do and I'm fairly independent except for needing a push sometimes or help carrying things.
HelloKit: TEACHERS, SCHOOL OFFICIALS, COUNSELORS, ETC.
phoenyxx: but I can usually push myself in my chair.
Pei: yep
jody-: Hell, Carly..... when you
nate__: i know exictly what you mean kit
* Pei just got his chair and i'm still getting used to
Jolene: Limitations are so frustrating. Knowing that they exist is different from wholly accepting them.
phoenyxx: jody: I don't like my limitations either but I feel good about myself because of what I've done in spite of them.
Mooooooo: You're basing your life philosophy on bureaucrats?
jody-: when you're a teenager you can't trust those people, even without a disability...
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Mimi_: totally, Jody...no one can whether their disabled or not *g*
Mimi_: er 'they're' I mean
jody-: You have 4 more years on me Simon..... I just joined the ranks this year
phoenyxx: Jolene: I know. I still do get fustrated at times. but for some reason it's over the smaller details.
phoenyxx: jody: ah. didn't know that :-)
jody-: I knew what you meant Mims.... ;)
Jolene: Is my not really accepting the fact that I'm disabled a sign of denial and also the reason I'm so depressed?
CincyKid: it's a generation gap thing- trust no one over 30 ;_)
phoenyxx: but I am still getting used to things.
ShyGirl17: does anyone know how to register your nick on here?????
jody-: Jolene..... yep.
* Pei was mad at his school physical theripist(sp?) because
Pei: i think she felt that i should keep walking until i was crawling on my hands and knees
sherri: i agree pei
*** ShyGirl17 is now known as Mary
phoenyxx: pei- some people get mad at me for having this chair and not the old 40 pound chair I used in the beginning.
medad: pei what is your disability?
Jolene: CincyKid, I'm 52 and I still don't trust a lot of people!
HelloKit: THAT'S RIDICULOUS! I THOUGHT PEOPLE WITH M.D. GOT WORSE THE MORE THEY DID.
Pei: but, she's no longer with us.
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Pei: LOL
Pei: j/k
jody-: Pei..... tell her to go shove it. I have found witth a lot of PT's that it is an ego thing for them if their patients do well... instead of worse
phoenyxx: pei- two words: IGNORE THEM! :-)
Pei: medad: muscular dystrophy.
phoenyxx: jody: you hit it on the head!
medad: thanks pei
phoenyxx: jody- every now and then some medical person will hassle me for using the chair. like it's my fault.
medad: I have had people question the fact that I use a cane to get around
phoenyxx: but I tell them to take a ride on Charon's ferry if they don't like it.
phoenyxx: :-)
Pei: jody-, phoenyxx: yes, but it was almost like she was discusted with me, and that hurt the most
DopeHat: its gonna get worse reguardless
medad: I can walk but sometimes I have great difficulty and I don't know when that will happen so I always have my cane with me
phoenyxx: pei- I've had people do the same thing to me.
jody-: my PT and I had a long talk about that subject..... lucky for me she is a very intelligent and insightful woman. she agreed with me....
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Pei: phoenyxx: yes, that's excactly what i'm talking about.
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Jolene: My disabilities are not apparent to the naked eye, and I get questioned all the time about faking it because I'm not in a wheelchair or missing a limb. Makes me really angry.
phoenyxx: should I explain 'Charon's ferry'? :-)
Pei: hmmm
jody-: don't allow them to get you down Pei...... their ego problems are NOT yours..
Pei: phoenyxx: sure,,,
Pei: jody-: thanx :)
phoenyxx: Jolene: that's something that makes me angry too, a few disabled people acting like a clique.
gordon4: Why let people bither you. You only have to account to yourself.
HelloKit: I ALWAYS HAD CLASHES WITH MY PT TOO... WHAT I NEVER UNDERSTOOD WAS WHY SHE WANTED ME TO DO THINGS THE 'NORMAL' WAY INSTEAD OF THE WAY THEY WORKED FOR ME.
jody-: I get that all the time too Jolene. Pisses me off!!!!!
phoenyxx: Jolene: people see me in my chair and still someone will think I'm out on a sick ploy for attention or fraud.
phoenyxx: no joke.
Pei: HelloKit: exactly... it's the same way with mine,....
DopeHat: the only good thing about pt is that your tendons don't tighten up as fast
Pei: i hate all doctors, all doctors hate me :)
* phoenyxx says that Charon is the Greek mythological
sherri: yep kit
HelloKit: LOL
* Pei 's tendons are really tight.....
Pei: heh
gordon4: Pei: You need to get a positive attitude'
Jolene: What do you do about it? How do you rationalize it so that these idiots who question your disabilities don't get you totally depressed?
jody-: I took out a whole town police dept. over that issue..... let me tell you - they dropped my tickets real fast...
Pei: they want to leinghten my heelcords......
DopeHat: so are mine
Pei: i said 'no way!'
sherri: my mom is like that.
phoenyxx: Jolene: well, once I presented a letter of confession that it was a hoax because I was so depressed and tired of getting hassled about it.
Mooooooo: Jolene, you are under no obligation to rationalize your disability to anyone.
Pei: jody- LOL!
jody-: Jolene..... I hate having the physical problems that I do but I won't let assholes (pardon) get me down..
sherri: i get mad.
DopeHat: i had that done pei
phoenyxx: 'telling someone to ride Charon's ferry'= saying 'go to hell' :-)
* Pei 's biggest problem is with the kids at school, the
medad: I was leaving a resturant in a small town and a 8 y.o. boy said to me 'you don't need a cane' the people in the resturant just got quiet. I knew they were discussing me and my use of a cane. I was devastated and ashamed. People wouldn't look me in the eye.
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jody-: Jolene.... don't rationalize. it is none of their f------ business why you are disabled
Jolene: I get upset easily when people question my disabilities. Part of it is the fact that I've had some brain damage and that sets me off and I get angry much faster than before the brain problems last year.
HelloKit: SIMON, I THINK 'GO TO HELL' IS MORE EFFECTIVE.
medad: this small town is where I live
nate__: pei everone sead that to me to
Pei: yes
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nate__: it dosent work
phoenyxx: Carly: true but the Charon referrence has a little more finese to it :-)
Pei: that's usuallyu what i say to people at school :)
ShyGirl17: hi
jody-: brb..... having problems
Jolene: Hi ShyGirl!
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ShyGirl17: hi how are you???
Pei: YOu can't ignore them, they know you can hear them and they know you are hurt by it, and that's all that matters.
phoenyxx: what's helped me in dealing with people is that I know alot more people are supportive and really cool about it.
nate__: pei i had that prolbm intel 6th grade
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jody-: as you get older Pei.... it will get easier even if just a little bit.
HelloKit: I HAVE ONE MORE QUESTION FOR YOU GUYS...
Pei: nate__: i just got out of 8th grade, and they *STILL* do it
Jolene: I have to learn to let those idiot comments pass, but it still cuts me deeply.
Mooooooo: ok
jody-: remember Jolene.... you don't own the problem, they do.
phoenyxx: Jolene: I can relate. I;m not as stressed about it now, but still it's so galling at times where and when I might get hassled about it.
nate__: the reason they stoped on me was that i made a frend the most populser person in school and then people left em alone
Pei: Sometimes i don't know whether i'm going to cry, or go into a psychopathic rage... (i did that once)
Jolene: But I have to live with myself.
jody-: Jolene.... get mad, don't get depressed.
medad: I am going to go now, I don't know where I fit in anymore. Good night all... God Bless!!!
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HelloKit: FOR THOSE WHOSE DISABILITIES ARE ACCIDENT OR INJURY-RELATED, DO YOU EVER FEEL ANY RESENTMENT TOWARD THE PERSON (IF ANY) WHO CAUSED IT?
phoenyxx: good one jody
jody-: YES!!!!!!!!!!!
Pei: HelloKit: not at all
Pei: oop
Pei: injury-related, nevermind
Pei: :)
nate__: pei are you in speach ed
DopeHat: i have so much anger inside i could kill someone
Pei: nate__: no.
jody-: but when the settlement comes in, I will feel much better..... ;)
Jolene: Many days I feel that angry too!
Pei: jody-: :)
ShyGirl17: that's not good to have so much anger about an accident
jody-: and I will take all of you for a ride in my brand new Viper. when I buy it that is...
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ShyGirl17: :-)
Pei: jody-: :) lol.
phoenyxx: jody: Viper???? OH I WANT ONE OF THOSE!! coolest car on earth!
phoenyxx: hehehe
jody-: in black...... roadster, not the GTS
phoenyxx: jody: of course!
nate__: in my hs what they did was put all of the intensive kids (bad ones, druges) in with the spechel ed kids and the intessive kis protect the peoplet that are being teased
Pei: woo
jody-: I am going to be the only disabled driver in the SCCA
HelloKit: I HAVE A FRIEND WHOSE COUSIN WAS PLAYING WITH A GUN AND SHOT HIM (MY FRIEND) BY ACCIDENT, AND NOW HE'S A QUADRIPLEGIC.
Jolene: ShyGirl: My disabilities were not accident or injury related, but medical problems that were skrewed up by the medical profession.
phoenyxx: I'm only 5'4' though, so all people would see in their rear view mirrors is sunglasses and a pair of gloves on the wheel :-)
ShyGirl17: oohhh IC
jody-: lol
ShyGirl17: :-)
Pei: lol
phoenyxx: :-)
jody-: look gang.... my friend is a witch... Anyone want a hex or two that they can use?
HelloKit: HE NEVER TALKS ABOUT IT, SO I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS COUSIN.
HelloKit: LOL JODY
Pei: jody-: yes, please. :)
jody-: I told my doctor and lawyers to behave.... I had black candles with their names on them
Pei: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!
phoenyxx: jody: is she a good witch or a bad witch? :-)
CincyKid: Got to say goodbye for now, maybe check in later. Nite to all!
jody-: good witch....
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phoenyxx: jody: :-)
Pei: 'nite
jody-: goodnight
Pei: jody-: hey what about those hexes i wanted ;)
Pei: LOL
phoenyxx: 'The Joy of Hex' :-)
Pei: LOL!
phoenyxx: by Hex Luthor
phoenyxx: :-)
jody-: LOL
Pei: HAHAH!
jody-: where's Mimi?
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phoenyxx: damn
Pei: hmmm
jody-: there she goes
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Pei: ahhh
Pei: another victim taken by lag
jody-: they're dropping like flies
ShyGirl17: so how is everyone doing tonight??
jody-: Carly..... you okay?
HelloKit: YEAH, WHY?
jody-: you're quiet
HelloKit: OH, SORRY...
phoenyxx: hey shygirl...I am fine here :-)
jody-: don't be silly....
HelloKit: GETTING TIRED
jody-: long day?
ShyGirl17: that's good Jody :-)
END

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